Not brave enough

I am afraid that the days are empty, and the people around me can’t speak together. Their growth hides the unknown wounds of each other. I am only sad occasionally, sorry for their contribution to myself. Always like this, don’t guess how good it should be to wear, say love that I like but can’t reach, forgive me for owning it selfishly all these years, too far and too close, silent happiness and love. All of a sudden, it became fragile, and I felt uncomfortable for a long time because of one word. Those wounds were obviously old and old, leaving scars in the years. I once recovered and was really good. There are still a lot of things that I don’t believe. I am still stubborn and don’t want to worry too much. I am a little tired and tired at first, but the road to dream is still farther than I imagined. Some people are getting farther and farther. They feel hopeless even if they try their best to catch up. Finally, they have to persuade themselves to let go. What they miss is not only the present, but also a certain position in the future. When I was too tough, my heart became indifferent. What would I look like when I was alone behind the sunshine? Anyway, whether to hide or not, that person can’t see it, so sad and happy can never see the difference. I started to suffer from insomnia at night without any reason. I remembered a lot of things but couldn’t understand them. In the end, only headache became entangled day and night, but there was still no answer for those wild thoughts, there is nothing left. No computer, no mobile phone, no book, no person, life is only eating and sleeping, and it becomes no different from pigs, but people don’t understand the sorrow of pigs, just like I said a lot, I finally confused myself at the end. I cut my hair and dyed the color. Who knows that it can’t be completely remoulded, just like loneliness is my destiny, and you can only see me who smiles very well and lives very well, people are used to living with masks. After a long time, they forget that there is a real face under the mask. I became more and more afraid of running around. I did too many stupid things to punish others. Finally, I even felt tired of myself. Finally, I gradually became immune to filter the hurt. It turned out that except myself, no one can give such love. Looking at a face, I felt like crying inexplicably. I remembered that he had treated you heartily and that he had been waiting for you for many years willingly. After all, those things could only be remembered, will your soul be relieved when I think of one day? Winter seems to have passed all the spring, but I want to climb the highest mountain in my home to see the snow. The remaining snow can no longer be as lively as when I was young, however, I still accept the blessings of the new year in this way. There are still so many people who have no time to meet that I feel it is a pity. Forgive me for not doing what I tried so hard to do. There are so many friends, but it seems to disappear when I am sad, maybe I really can’t speak, which scares you. I have never changed the one I used to be! But you don’t know what happened later. At first, I didn’t want to trouble and just wanted to be simple. I married myself at some time. I just wanted to marry and have children like every ordinary girl and fulfill the necessary obligations for women. However, but I can’t do it, because I care too much about dreams, more than life. Listening to the care of friends will still be warm, but they will not tell the other side to know. It is really bad to understand a person. Who will understand such pressure? Pretending to be true on one side, I can’t say it after seeing it, how sad it can be! You don’t believe it anymore, and I’m too lazy to make yourself embarrassed. I think I am not brave enough. I am scared. The Dream of the future becomes heavy, the wings are burnt, the tears are burning, at least you can complain occasionally, but it is not easy to have temper, and you really become not brave enough.

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