First drop of tears

In the first half of 1997, I graduated from primary school and took a vacation for more than two months. I was bored and bored, and there was nothing to do. Maybe it was because I stayed at the grade twice in primary school, or I was not motivated at the primary school stage, and my poor grades disappointed them again and again, in desperation, the teachers are not leaving me any more. From the very beginning, I was informed to my parents about the matter of relegation. But at that time, it was not me who had the final say, but my parents and teachers who had the final say, so when my classmates two years younger than me were together, I felt uncomfortable and felt guilty mentally. No one can imagine the only guilt and inner pain. Then, when I was in junior high school, my uncle, aunt and neighbors all persuaded me not to study and asked me to go to work in the city. I seemed a little unwilling, I didn’t listen to their opinions, but still wanted to read. I didn’t know what the reading energy in my mind was. Maybe I felt very lonely at that time, living alone in a quiet mountain village, it seemed that the feeling of desolation scared me very much, so no matter how bad my study was, I had to finish the nine-year compulsory education. Moreover, I felt that this day was a long time. I waited for several days and didn’t come yet. I was in a hurry. Sometimes, I was afraid of my aunt’s nagging, and I dared not go to my uncle’s home, so I was always depressed in my own home. From then on, I fell in love with the habit of reading books. My mother was good at one sentence: You are so good at reading, and you have been admitted to college, so you can really read books, you won’t read it again. I was scolded by my mother at that time. Well, I couldn’t wait to burn all the books. My graduation exam has passed for a long time, and I don’t know how my grades are. I have been looking forward to it. When I was anxious until the fifth day, the admission notice for junior high school came, but I didn’t write the score on it, so I couldn’t find out whether my score was bad or excellent. However, I I am happy to receive the admission notice, but when the notice was received, but I found that my family had no money for me to study, and I began to feel depressed again. On Friday of that day, my father went outside to collect books for me, and there were only my mother and me at home. It was very hard for my father to borrow money outside. A week passed without waiting for my father’s people to come back. I was bored at home and occasionally helped my mother do some housework, but most of the time, I sat alone at the head of the bed or in a wheelchair in a daze. When I was really unable to sit at home, I went to my uncle’s door to turn around, because the path of my uncle’s home was the only way to go to junior high school, so I would watch them go back and forth when going to and from middle school, it seems that I will feel that I have not given up on the way of reading. My father didn’t come back after borrowing money, but there were more gossips at home. At that time, my aunt often nagged about my father in front of my ears. I felt terrified. Why did this happen? Why is dad like this? Dad! Come back soon! Come back soon! I would rather not study than let you suffer such grievances and insults. Dad! Dad! What’s wrong with you? Why do they say that about you? I have been thinking that I have been waiting for his return. Aunt said: Your father is too bad. He can do such a thing, which really loses your face. At first, I didn’t know what happened. I asked aunt with a heavy heart: what’s the matter? Is there anything so serious? Aunt became more angry and said: Your father is outside. In order to lend you money to study, he first went to your aunt’s house. He said that he wanted to buy cattle at home and needed to borrow money. Then aunt went to know about it, this is not the case, so I don’t lend it. Then go to Ye Ting’s house in the ancient city. Your father’s friend said he wanted to buy fertilizer and borrow some money. Ye Ting’s house didn’t have it, so he went to your grandmother’s house to borrow it from your two uncles, your father said he was building a house, and your uncle happened to meet Changgen in the village and asked him. The topic was exposed, so he had to borrow it from his aunt’s home in Ningbo and changlv town, they didn’t have a home, so they had to go to the streets to ask for it. In fact, I really wanted to ask the reason at that time. He knew so much that he knew everything clearly when he went to Ningbo and evergreen. Was he an immortal. But I thought if I really asked if those words were useful, I might as well wait for my father to come back. I have heard it for several times, and she just said that you should stop studying and just go outside to work. I also thought that I would not study as long as my father came back, but sometimes I was unwilling. No matter what others advised, I insisted on having a few classes in school, can you comfort your heart! As for Aunt’s words, I don’t want to listen to them any more, nor do I want to use them immediately. Several days after the school started, my father was nowhere to be seen. At that time, I was a little worried, but the gossip was not stopped, but spread constantly. While thinking about my father’s coming back in my heart, I also hoped that my father could borrow the money back, and I could study well. I didn’t want to give up at once, but it didn’t work. Since there were rumors, my heart was tortured to death. Mom? In addition to complaining about my father, sometimes she would scold me with a few words. Maybe she was more upset than me recently, so she wanted to talk about me, and once she talked about me, I won’t gnaw any more. One day, I went to my aunt’s house again. Because of boredom, I went to dig bamboo shoots in the bamboo forest behind my aunt’s house. When I was really digging, I suddenly heard my mother crying, I came down and found that my aunt was talking about my father, which made my mother pale. Therefore, sometimes my mother tried her best to explain to herself, sometimes she was helpless, because she felt that she couldn’t wash herself even she jumped into the Yellow River, she cried when she felt wronged. In fact, it may be something that my mother instigated me. The most important thing is my own requirement, which forced my father to curse for the ages outside. To say wrong, it is my fault in the final analysis, so I should reflect on myself. When I heard that my mother was crying sadly, I also felt extremely sad. After these days, mom has been in a bad mood, and she doesn’t talk much. I am very worried when I see my mother like this. A few days later, a week has passed since the school started, and I really miss my father. I don’t know how my father is doing outside, which may be the most anxious thing for me. On the evening of the day, when the sun was nearly setting, my father came back. I went out and called my father for the first time, as if my father and I hadn’t met each other for several years. My father took out 300 yuan in cash from his pocket to let me go to school. In fact, the money was just a fraction, which was not enough to pay the book fee at all. The second sister said it was Uncle’s contribution in front of outsiders, but not all of them, because I took 300 yuan to pay the book fee, my uncle didn’t go with me. He didn’t ask me to go to junior high school before he said dad didn’t come. Instead, he repeatedly persuaded me to give up studying, now my father took the money and paid a part of my book fee to let me study. It was a little exaggerated to say their contribution. My father had just arrived at home, but he hadn’t had a rest yet. He was shouted by my mother. It was true that my mother’s grievance was vented. However, my father became angry at once and didn’t know who to tell, he was so angry that he was going to confront him. Mom said: you are coming! Did you cheat that family of money? Oh! You are really capable. If you are such a person, you can’t cheat money. You go to beg for dinner. Dad shouted: who said it! Who said it! You call me! Confronted me. Mom said: no confrontation, the village has spread all over! You will know when you go to the village to inquire. You also listen to them like this. Is their words so good? Dad said. Mom said: Your sister-in-law is also saying that you can ask him if you don’t believe it. You must know what you do! Later, my father didn’t know whether he had confronted him, so this matter couldn’t be solved. But my father and mother hadn’t talked for a long time and kept silent all the time. As for me, because my father borrowed money for me, I started to go to junior high school.

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