The Coward’s weekend

Last weekend, the precious two days were forced to be completely handed over to work, and the following days seemed to be spent in LAX thinking and perfunctory things. Although people sat in front of the desk steadily, there was always a voice shouting in their hearts, urging me to escape quickly. The closer the weekend is, the louder the restless shouting seems to be, therefore, I had to try my best to suppress it and reprimanded it severely, so that I would not be hoarse. I don’t know whether the millions of people sitting in front of their desks in Beijing are as exaggerated as me. Maybe many people still like to work hard and seek promotion. On weekends, I am afraid that it is only a temptation for people like me who do not seek for progress or career. After all, how pathetic and helpless it is to do things that you dislike for several days in a row, and then you can get a little free time to do something that you like. An office worker and a housewife, my two identities are doomed to be submerged in trifles in daily life, but at the same time, sadly, I am also a free man who is willing to immerse myself in the spiritual world cast by words and fantasy and eager to enjoy personal time. This contradiction is irreconcilable in daily life. Even if you are busy with dinner and cheer yourself up, telling yourself to hurry up and comfort yourself when dragging the floor, this must be the last thing today. As long as you finish it, immediately lie on the bed and read beautifully. But time didn’t tolerate me once. Every time I looked up at the hour hand, I was disappointed again and again. Actually, there was little time left for me. Therefore, gradually, having my own leisure time has become my extravagant hope, while weekends have naturally become my happy hope and expectation in my life. If there is no entanglement of housework, no job, no date, and no annoying disturbance, then this weekend is just like a delicate and sweet ice cream cake. Just think about it, people can’t help drooling. On a gray winter morning, lying on the warm double bed, I slept till I woke up naturally. Even if I woke up, I didn’t have to get up in a hurry. I picked up a book beside the bed and read slowly. Of course, the body should be shrank into the quilt, and the most comfortable posture should be found. At this time, the last thing I want is that my husband will be sober. I always selfishly hope that he can sleep a little more, and sleep a little more. I ‘d better sleep until I’m tired of watching, when I have to get up to fill my stomach again. As long as he wakes up, all peace and tranquility will be broken. I hate that he turns on the TV, and the news broadcast fills the whole room, just like the noise pulls the sleeping people out of their dreams, which makes me angry but helpless. If he urged me to make breakfast unwittingly at this moment, I would certainly burst out and completely ignored his innocent and confused expression. No wonder that he would never understand the beauty I wanted, so the most horrible thing on weekends was that my neuroticism set off the quarrel between the two sides, and then all the good times were wasted in vain. I remember that Taiwan writer San Mao once said that her ideal was to be a wife of a great artist. When I read her articles, I was still a junior high school student who received noble ideal education, so I didn’t understand or even despised this at that time. But sadly, I don’t know when I began to fall, and I just want to be a housewife, have a husband who loves me, a warm home, and can freely control my life every day, do what you like in the sunny afternoon and enjoy the laziness alone. I like to open my eyes in the morning under the light of the first dawn, kiss my lover beside the pillow gently, and welcome the new day happily. I like to lean against the big French window and see the traffic shuttling downstairs through the glass. I like to shrink on the soft and warm bed, quietly listening to the sound of the rain outside or the sound of the rustling wind, or a large area of snow, and then stretch out of the window to pick up a small flower, watching it condense into tears in the palm of your hand. Or in a sleepless night, unscrew the desk lamp on the head of the bed and let it give out soft warm light. In peace, quietly listen to the even breath of the lover beside the pillow, and then read a story that touches yourself, until the story was finished, tears wet the pillow towel and then fell asleep. But at this moment, I could only sit in front of my desk helplessly and sigh. Or in another five or ten years, I can bravely jump out of the office grid, embrace all dreams and freedom, and turn all imaginary romance into reality. But five or ten years is too long, I can’t wait, and I don’t want to wait. Things that are too far away can be thought but cannot wait. Waiting itself is a kind of suffering. I don’t want to suffer from this kind of suffering, therefore, I can only choose cowardly to extend the short weekend time with my imagination, infinitely, from now on until I grow old, so that I have a long weekend, do what I like with all my heart, and don’t have to worry about the flash of time in two days. On a sunny winter afternoon, in a towering business building, there was a coward sitting steadily in a small grid piled up by computers and files, bowed his head and was busy. 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New set sail

During this period of time, when I sat in front of the computer and looked at the blank document, I was always stunned and couldn’t write a word for a long time. Since I went to work, there have always been excuses like this and that. I always feel that I am busy, so there are sufficient reasons not to write. Until today, my mind is blank, and I can’t find the previous state or the passion and inspiration for writing. I am lazy, too lazy to make me terrible. I can’t imagine the situation that I can’t write words. I am even afraid. If one day I lose my words, what kind of state will I be? Will I still be what I am now? I can totally imagine that without words, it would be like I have no soul! 2011 nian end of a I worry irritability, I almost lost myself, in 2012 of the start, I have to have a brand new start, start again, let my heart quiet down, don’t be moved or dyed by the outside world. I want to find myself, my previous state and my previous mood of writing articles. (Ii) stick to the evening, read an article published in the magazine reader, a couple from Sichuan mountain village for the education of the mountain village, giving up the superior living environment and treatment it took only 21 years to stay in the harsh environment on the high mountain. My husband said: if there was no successor, I would have been unable to get up. For so many years, I have always been a woman and a husband, and my wife never complained. She and her husband have been educating the children of the mountain village in this remote country and sending away students one after another. After reading, I was thinking, what supported them? What makes them have such meditation and desire in today’s material-oriented environment? This is a kind of faith, a kind of great kindness, a kind of persistence! They completely forgot themselves, and in their hearts and eyes were those children who were eager for knowledge! They all stuck to such a difficult belief, and what about me? It’s just a small dream, and it has favorable conditions. For example, now, I am in a house with heating on, in a house with transparent lights, without cold and darkness, is there any reason why we can’t stick to it? Is there any excuse to evade? (3) from the beginning to the end, I once said that words are my lover and my spirit. I almost lost her during this period of time. I’m ashamed! In the future, no matter under what circumstances, I will never give up. I will be loyal to this lover and will not neglect her because of my personal subjective reasons. I will treat her attentively. In spring, I will watch flowers bloom and fall with her, Catkins fly and listen to the growth of all things. In summer, I will take her to listen to the birds singing and watch the dragonflies flying and flourishing. In autumn, I will share the joy of harvest with her and feel the silence of leaves. In winter, I hugged her, watched the snowflakes dancing, listened to the sound of the Earth, and left our footprints on the silent snow until far away, far away Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) change the way to continue to stay with this city I went out at 6 o’clock in the morning and came back at almost 8 o’clock in the evening. From beginning to end, I only welcomed myself with silence; Since I went to college, on weekends… [Original essay] string words Since winter, the sky is dry and the snow is misty. The whole earth is desolate and empty. Whether your mood is like a year, or… Forever military dream Forever military Dream (Ma Xiaochun, Kangle county, Gansu province) memories are like meteors, passing through the unmarked and blurred eyes, and the outline gradually… Spring rain I like spring rain like everything on the Earth. Just after the new year, the sky began to rain. I really like the spring in Jiangnan… Plucked the snowflakes of Dreams (modified) Near the new year, the first snow fell. I was surprised to read a long scroll in the morning, the white one is snow, and the gray one is tree… Self The fashion is transient, and the style is permanent. Things that can shine on others may not be put here. In…