In February, bring a wet heart

I always look for the past time in the coming time, leave in the time I should come, stay in the time I should go; I can’t keep up with the beat all the time, has been refused or lagging slightly behind, is this fate 2012 of er yue again, actually every year experience er yue, annual er yue are filled with romantic and Rose, qing shen yi nong. It has been 25 years since I first knew Valentine’sDay, I have not had too many extravagant hopes. I don’t like flowers, nor am I deliberately lofty. I just feel that I am not suitable, I am not used to suddenly becoming bored one day, and then I am happy or sad for a bunch of flowers, a box of chocolate and a long-cherished gift. So in the age when I should have received roses, I always received Lilies. The only time someone gave roses, I didn’t even know who they were, maybe this is a kind of happiness or a kind of sadness. Fortunately, I don’t have to think much about it. Being a little rational is the principle that I always stick to things. So a few years later, I stood in the sunshine of February, and when all kinds of advertisements, big and small businesses spread to Valentine’sDay, I forgot myself at the window in the morning. There were Lantern Festival and Valentine’sDay in February of 2012, but in February of 2012, it was still thin and not cold. Cotton-padded clothes, hats and gloves were still the costumes of pedestrians. Recently, there has been nothing to do, and I always like to look around. I have found two magazines in a pile of books, one of which is “lover” and the other is “women’s Square”, which have probably turned over several pages, most of the contents are love stories. It is not that a beautiful woman meets a handsome, rich and single man in the elevator, which leads to an emotional entanglement. It is about the relationship of love triangle, who falls in love with whom, who falls in love with another person after being loved, anyway, it is all related to feelings. I don’t know how real such a thing is in real life. In the several words I have seen, there is nothing more than one thing in common. Most of the leading women in the story are sexy and beautiful, with a devil-like figure, an angel-like face, charming eyes, passionate. And the male owners in the story are all handsome and rich, living in luxury houses and driving famous cars, with elegant life and high taste. After reading several articles in succession, I felt quite touched in my heart: This is really a changeable era. Even love needs capital and scheming? Is the love of this era more or less connected with money? So is there no way out for a woman like me who has no beautiful face, sexy figure and charming eyes? Similarly, those men who have no houses or cars, shouldn’t you have love? After a rough thought, I didn’t dare to have the idea of going on. As the 80’s generation, I was deeply immersed in these stories for a while, which was somewhat sad, one day, a friend said that he was watching “Beijing Love Story” recently, saying that the plot was good. After watching it, I saw less than half of the story and basically understood the plot. This is a TV series that gathers numerous social hot spots such as beifao, the second rich generation, the defeated women, house slaves and so on. It is straightforward and real. The love in the play comes and goes only three words, I love you, I hate you, break up, get together. The seemingly simple plot actually contains a portrayal of the current emotional entanglement. As a woman, I didn’t go through the emotional stories in books or TV. I was just a woman who treated love as love and treated it with heart. On this road, I don’t know how far I can go or how far I can be perfect. I just want to face all the real or unreal life with my real self. When I was young, I didn’t know the secular world or the indifference of human feelings. I remembered all the villages, fields, cattle and sheep, mountain flowers and my mother’s bright eyes in my mind. It seemed that these scenes went away in a flash. Those figures who once ran in the field grew tall one by one, and then went away one by one. Many familiar faces also began to become blurred. It was at such a moment that I began to become sensitive and scared, and became a little panic. I was afraid that I would lose myself accidentally. But slowly, I still found what I lacked. For example, it is no longer easy to be happy, to believe in a person, to have nothing to worry about, to have so many candies, to have a delicious meal, A new dress or even a visit to relatives would arouse a lot of happiness. At that time, happiness was very simple and easy, and everything was so beautiful in childhood. But nowadays, many beautiful things are getting farther and farther, just like we have to go many ways to pursue a certain wish. This road will be curved, muddy, and even full of thorns, but at that time, we were willing to overcome difficulties and even give up a lot for our ideals. After all, when we really realize this wish, what is left in our hearts except joy is emptiness and loss. This is life, which is losing as well as gaining. However, I should remember that sentence anyway: Never Lose Yourself, violate your own principles and forget your original intention for the sake of dreams. Standing under the clouds in February, the air was still full of cold, and the bustling crowd were all wrapped in thick cotton-padded clothes, shuttling, walking and searching. Were they searching for their dreams or for life? In the youth, who is patched with glass pieces on the ground in February, who is sprinkled with uneven bright colors in February, and who will think of the figure far away in a lonely day. There is a long way to go, and I will search up and down. The February of 2012 has just begun. It is unknown whether there will be some accidents happening. However, many feelings about February will be filtered in my heart, and the beneficial ones will be left behind. Others will be overwhelmed by time, and then I will be in a sunny day, plant a small tree with good mood in a windy day, and watch it grow taller

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