Grandpa

I have never seen Grandpa, and I don’t know how he looks, including his figure, appearance and living habits. It seems that I have no memory at all. I don’t know how to talk about my grandfather, nor how to explain his affairs. The most important thing is to sort out the personal quality of my grandfather from my mother’s conversation. Now I am asked to recall my grandfather’s past, as if I stepped on my dream and told the story of cattle, ghosts, gods and snakes, with no clue. Just as my neighbor Old Man C recalled the story of my elder generation, I felt very strange about their existence and detailed explanation. Because after he died of disease before I was three years old, my memory of him didn’t stop, just like running water leaving in a hurry, which had already gone forever. So how can I talk about my grandfather’s affairs? How can I talk about his past? Apart from my understanding of my parents, I must find out his deeds from my grandfather’s people, but he was too far away from me to hold some memories in my mind, so I often wanted to give up, but he was involved in some past events when I was young, I have to elaborate on my grandfather. Mom said: Grandpa has learned martial arts, but he won’t beat people when he has the best martial arts. Mom said that he was too kind to beat people, aiming at people coming here to make trouble, however, he achieved the character of swearing and not fighting back. I don’t know whether this is the industry standard of Chinese traditional martial artists. It seems that many martial arts films on TV plays show such a style. Maybe former martial artists, they all kept self-restraint in the way of striking others later, but when they couldn’t bear it, they all attacked with heavy punches, took out a killer’s trump card and made him go back in his color. I don’t know Grandpa’s martial arts, just like I don’t know Grandpa’s people. For me, he is just a virtual shadow in my dream, I don’t know where my grandfather’s real strength is. But with such a legend, I always thought grandpa was my real hero. He was amazing. My mother also said: My grandfather was very kind to me, and he was very kind to me, and he also cared about it very much. One time when I was in public for New Year’s Eve, I accidentally broke a bowl and saw my grandfather’s expression at that time, when he closed his mouth and slanted his eyes, I cried. My grandfather was very sad when he saw my crying. He took me over and said: Oh… oh …… grandpa is not good! My grandfather is not so fierce to you, kill him! Killed grandpa! Oh… oh… don’t cry! Do not cry! My good nephew won’t cry! In my mother’s memory, this was the first contact between me and my grandfather. Another time, my grandfather was ill. My mother and I went to visit him at my grandmother’s house. He had already been unable to get up on the couch. I was sitting on the bench at the door in my mother’s arms. At that time, my uncle came in and saw that I couldn’t walk on the ground, he seemed to hate me very much. In the first sentence, he pointed at me and said to my mother, “just throw this child away or strangle him. Why bother to raise him and support him? It’s not! If you work hard, you will also bring trouble to your family’s production and life. Is it worth doing so? Mom said, Grandpa was very angry. He saw his hands trembling and his breath gasping. Then his expression was blue and hot. He seemed to stand up and scold his uncle, but he could not move anything and could not say anything. The whole person was haunted by illness. He could no longer fight against injustice for me. However, my mother didn’t want to give up me at that time, and finally raised me up. (I remember my mother recalled that I couldn’t walk on the ground within 33 months after I was born, that is to say, when I could walk, I was about to be four years old at my nominal age. Because I walked slowly, not only my uncle looked at me like this, but also my uncle and neighbors despised me with the same eyes. I remember that my mother recalled the plot that my uncle told her: I told you before that I asked you to give birth to one, but now you have given birth to two, but now you are suffering losses! I’m saying this, but you don’t listen. Mom said that she ignored him and gave birth to me voluntarily. But now when I think of it, it seems that I owe them, which really brings trouble to the whole family’s production and life.) Later, I don’t know when it was, about half a year! A burst of bad news came, saying that grandpa had passed away and asked us to go to grandma’s house to attend the funeral for Grandpa. Because I was still young and could not walk, my mother placed me in a family and left me there. My brother and parents sent my grandfather on the road together. In the year when my grandmother passed away, my aunt (that is, my grandfather’s sister) was talking about my grandfather’s life with her relatives and friends nearby, as if they were all vivid and detailed. However, when it comes to Grandpa’s affairs at this time, it doesn’t matter to me, so I don’t have the need to record them in detail.

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